A Meditation for Allowing the Possibility of Possible In Deep Grief

In this guided practice, Brenda K. Mitchell offers an invitation to anyone who might be struggling to see a way forward through grief.

When we are adrift in the wide sea of grief, it can be difficult to imagine any world other than the world of our intense sorrow and loss. Things like going back to our normal daily tasks, or having fun again, or being able to think of our loved one without crying—these can seem so far out of reach that they might as well be impossible.

In this guided meditation, Brenda Mitchell offers one tiny heart-opening invitation: simply allowing what she calls “the possibility of possible.” There isn’t an expectation that you have answers, or lots of hope, or a clear path forward. Rather, this is a tender way to be with the many difficult emotions that accompany losses in our lives, while opening the door just a bit to what might lie ahead.

Discovering the Possibility of Possible In Deep Grief

1. Let’s begin by closing our eyes and taking a few deep breaths. Inhale. One, two, three. And exhale. One, two, and three. 
2. If you’d like, place one hand over the other on your heart. Remove everything that you may have brought in here with you—the tension and the anxieties that may be present in the moment, in the room, or in your neck. See if you can open up and loosen everything that you may have brought with you. Let’s breathe one more time. 
3. Now, do a quick body scan and allow for more movement within the structures and the internal parts of our body. Let’s get comfortable—like a couch potato, like Netflix comfortable. Feel that release down into the neck as we open up to receive enlightenment and the divinity of nature and the wonderfulness that is our very own body system. 
4. Let that comfort flow down through your shoulders and down through your hands. Shake your hands just a little bit to know that you’re in control and you’re operating and let that flow go through the center region of your body. Blowing up and down through your hips, your thighs, your legs. Allow your feet to feel planted on the solid ground beneath you today.  
5. If you are facing deep grief in this moment, I invite you to make room for those feelings. You might notice that sometimes in our fragility, brokenness, and disappointments, we stop imagining that anything good can ever be possible again. There is a block there, a hopelessness. We can’t see a way forward at all. 
6. For this moment, I invite you to embrace the possibility of possible. That’s it. You don’t have to have answers, or lots of hope, or a clear path forward. This is just about opening the door and allowing the possibility of possible. 
7. See if you can gently settle onto a vision of yourself embracing possibility. What does that look like for you? Where are you? Are you indoors? Are you out? Is there anyone with you? Do you see the colors and the possibility of the dreams that we dream that can go dormant in grief? Maybe you can feel the warmth and the beauty of the sky. What does it mean for you to accept the hurt and pains of what was, while also moving toward the possibility of possible? 
8. I invite you to open your eyes as you are ready, and return back to my voice. There’s a poem that I’d like to share with you that has allowed me to imagine a  future version of myself who could open up to what is and embrace the possibility of possible. It is written by Gilda Radner and it states, I wanted a perfect ending. Now I’ve learned, the hard way, that some poems don’t rhyme, and some stories don’t have a clear beginning, middle, and end. Life is about not knowing, having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it, without knowing what’s going to happen next. It’s called Delicious Ambiguity. Thank you for your practice.