Creating Spaces for Empathy in Every Conversation

Date:


I was in my garden on a work break, when a woman walking by mentioned she liked my candidate signs. 

That simple observation sparked a conversation that evolved far deeper than politics. We talked about the candidates, the state of the world, and the hope we both held for the future.

This 70-ish woman shared her life experiences, including sexism, discrimination, and feeling “less than.” As we continued to talk, she shared about the lives of her sisters and her now 100-year-old mother, the challenges of giving birth, and the heartbreak that often comes from suffering a miscarriage. 

She told me her husband is living with Parkinson’s Disease. Her grandchildren make her so happy when they take over her basement and play. She worries about one grandchild who identifies as gay. She expressed sadness about her brothers and sisters, who seem to be living in a perspective very different from hers. She misses them.

A week ago, she experienced an extremely high heart rate and spent time in the hospital for observation. The doctors concluded that she was overwhelmed with stress and sadness. She was starting to walk again to improve her health. Occasionally, she laughed about telling her thoughts and life story to a stranger. We both agreed: she really needed to talk with someone. Listening to her was a privilege.

For an hour, I listened. Then, we exchanged names, without advice or judgment. That afternoon, there was work to do and meetings to attend, but at that moment, there was nowhere else I should have been. I gave her my focus, time, and the space to be vulnerable. 

This encounter reminds me of my time with students. There were so many times they just needed to talk. Often, my students held their challenges close to their hearts. Eventually, simple exchanges grew into meaningful connections that fostered my students’ confidence, trust, and willingness to be vulnerable.

Because we are teachers, our most important task is to create safe places for students. Even during standardized testing or when there are behavior challenges, we must always honor students by giving them our space, time, and attention. If we do all we can to show students how much we care and how much they matter, they will be strong forces for empathy in the world.

My neighbor and I agree. The world needs more empathy. Taking the time to connect over yard signs or in the classroom benefits everyone. While opportunities for connection can often be random, it’s important to take advantage when the time comes. Those connections can provide empathy—something the world always needs.


About the Author

Betsy Butler (she/her) is a Professional Learning Specialist at Teaching Channel. She holds a B.A. in English, and a Master’s in Education, and has been teaching since 1992. Betsy uses her three decades of teaching experience to write and revise our courses while selecting the perfect accompanying texts. Her specialty areas include ELA, special education topics, behavior management, and mental health.

Fun Fact: Betsy’s daily conquest is solving the New York Times crossword puzzle!

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